Alyssa gave me this opportunity to share with you my Jupiter Return story of this current Jupiter Transit for Libra. At risk of sounding too overly dramatic (I feel like that ship is about to sail), but what has happened so far in my Jupiter Return has opened my eyes to everything. I hoping my story, regardless of where your Jupiter is in your birth chart, can provide you hope and strength in your time of need, because God only knows I needed it!
I remember when I first learnt about my upcoming Jupiter Return, back in March, I was super excited. I mean, I have the “Planet of Luck”, one-third of my air sign threesome (grand trine with Saturn in Aquarius in the first house and Moon in Gemini in the fifth), returning back to where it was twenty-three years ago; conjunct with its homies the Sun and Part of Fortune in the ninth house with Libra. Unbeknownst to me at that time, I booked a holiday oversees to Sri Lanka leaving in the first week of November, so when I was able to draw the two together you can imagine how much excitement was going through my veins. It was the distraction I needed from my demoralizing job I had working for my local McDonald’s restaurant.
It got to a point at McDonald’s that I needed to get myself out of there and fast so I started looking for another job. However, I was afraid that employers will not look too kindly to an applicant who has spent all his working life for the ‘Golden Arches’, so I decided to do something that I never would have dreamt of doing before; lie on my resume.
Fast forward to late June and I am sitting in the reception area of another clean and classy law firm in downtown Melbourne, in a fresh suit I might add, for yet another job interview. I was not worried that my previous year working in law administration will crumble and the charade will disappear.
I needed this and my Mars and Mercury in the tenth house with Scorpio, along with my Libran charm and sociable skills, were on my side.
I can remember the interview went well. Too well, that I got the job without any of my “references” being called.
Further fast forward again to the beginning of August and I am on the train heading into downtown Melbourne to start my second week as a receptionist for the same law firm. After smashing out a pearler of a first week, my confidence went from an all-time high to absolutely astronomical.
Confidence is a luxury item to me, like having a personal trainer or eating a huge Sunday roast. Even though I was more than happy to be swept up in the arms of self-assurance and be whisked away into the sunset living happily-ever-after, the realist side of me, I feel is my Aquarius Ascendant, would not accept it.
Every day since the second week of my tenure at this law firm, my stamina, sanity and self-assurance goes through a gauntlet of paranoia, blame and negativity. This has primarily come in the form being made out to look an idiot in front of my colleagues. Despite working really hard almost every day, I always feel like I need to go the extra mile to prove my worth at this firm. My Saturn in the first house with Aquarius is getting one great work out at the moment due to this. Whenever you tell a Saturn in the first house person that they have done something wrong and it is their fault, no matter how small the issue is, it will affect them super hard. For me, having this happen to me every single day has dragged me down from the wondrous highs of being confident and happy, down to the deep depths of my psyche of being depressed, fearful and self-destructive. With the added pressure of needing a good job to comfortably pay my rent, utilities and bills, I cannot afford to keep thinking, “Well, this is it. You are going to be fired now because you failed to add one comma in this letter to a barrister.”
So, what now?
Do I quit while I am ahead or “tough it out”?
Truth be told, I do not want to go back to McDonald’s, and a part of me does not want to leave this new job either. Ever since Jupiter moved in with Libra, I am experiencing a whole new perspective on life. Before, I was hating everything and everybody, not owning up to my own wrongdoings and always looking out for an easier option rather than toughing it out like everyone else; frankly, I was a bit of a prick.
Now, I am all about waiting for that fat lady to sing.
I feel like Jupiter has raised a mirror to my face and told me to take a damn hard look at myself, and I did. I have realised that I have been spending way too much energy into ensuring I meet the high expectations I have set for myself at work, when all I needed to do was be distracted from the never ending realisation that no matter what I do, it never works. Because of that I have now taken up a few hobbies outside of work, like learning Mandarin, presenting an hour long radio show at my local community radio station and writing for Alyssa. I never felt this content for a life crisis before; I have become at peace with the idea of possibly being fired.
I feel like Jupiter is teaching me to not get too melodramatic with the worse possible outcomes in life and just have faith. Not necessarily of the religious kind either.
If I end up being let go from this job, I need to believe and have confidence in the fact that I did all I could to keep it and not leave with a heavy heart.
Also, when that door finally closes, I need to learn to trust that another one will be open waiting for me.